Hey babe. I think about this a lot too. I remember reading a quote somewhere (probably on Tumblr!) which talked about femme-ness as being about intentionality moreso than just looking feminine, and that resonated with me. I tend to feel good about my look if I’ve selected each piece of it with intentionality and put deliberate effort and thought into assembling it.
So, by that token, if you don’t have the time or money or whatever to put together a girly outfit and full face of makeup every day, but you still want to give yourself the feeling of having put effort into how you look, maybe you could start a more involved skincare routine, or spa-esque pampering in the evenings (bath, face mask, mani-pedi, etc). As someone who is very much not a morning person, I find that evening femme time makes me feel great even if I only have time for jeans and eyebrow pencil the next morning.
Wardrobe-wise: consider what the barriers are to you dressing femininely more often. For example, my barriers are weather and comfort. It’s hard for me to talk myself into wearing a dress or skirt when there’s a classic Canadian winter going on outside, or when the dress or skirt in question is stiff, overly tight, or requires constant adjustment. So, what helped me was to start investing in feminine basics that help me deal with these problems. For weather: thick tights, leggings, cute hats/scarves/gloves, and winter boots that I don’t hate. For comfort: AA ribbed racerback dresses (I have 4 of them; they are super comfy but also highlight my girly curves), skirts with stretchy waistbands, sweater dresses, etc. Maybe you could think about your own barriers to feminine dressing and then brainstorm some solutions for overcoming those roadblocks.
Makeup-wise: if your problem is that you wake up and just can’t muster the energy or find the time to do a full face, then practicing will help you, because the more you practice, the faster and easier it’ll be for you to do your face. Pare your routine down to only the items that really help you feel prettier, even if that means leaving out certain products that other people deem must-haves. Practice in the evenings, on weekends, or whenever you have a few spare leisurely hours. Follow along with YouTube tutorials, experiment with re-creating looks from Pinterest, play with your favorite colors, etc. Eventually you’ll stumble on a look that makes you feel really You and especially gorgeous, and with practice, you’ll be able to do it quickly.
But also: get comfortable with how your face looks with no makeup, or minimal makeup. It sucks to not be able to feel like yourself without extensive work and time. Maybe there’s another area of your aesthetic, like hair or jewelry or perfume, that you could focus on when you want to feel pretty but don’t want to bother with doing your face.
Hope that helps! Let me know if you want me to clarify or elaborate on anything. xoxox