Deal with the fear first. Write about it in your journal or talk it over with a trusted friend to figure out what the root of your fear is. What are you afraid will happen? Is it a realistic fear, or are you just psyching yourself out?
When you start to feel oversensitized, it may be that you need to back off and stimulate yourself in a different way. Genitals become even more super-sensitive as they get close to orgasm, so you may find that stimulating them directly doesn’t work as well. Switch to a more indirect form of stimulation. (If you have a vulva, that probably means rubbing your clit through its hood or your inner labia instead of touching it directly.)
Mostly, don’t make orgasm your expectation. Focus on exploring your pleasure potential. If it feels good, you’re doing it right – and you might orgasm, or you might not, but you don’t NEED to.
