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2013: The Year of Self-Care

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1. What did you do in 2013 that you’d never done before?
Had a sex dream about Jon Hamm, binge-watched the entirety of The Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother and New Girl and Orange is the New Black and American Horror Story, saw The Birds and A Hard Day’s Night and Rear Window in a theatre, became a moderator for AskWomen, did consult work for Toronto Public Health, was solicited by the Huffington Post to write an article, saw Brent Carver’s solo cabaret show, became a Tim Hortons convert, took university philosophy courses (and loved them), bought Frye boots, hung out in a courthouse for a day and wrote a story about it for school, had business cards made, did a Skype job interview, wrote a feature story about queer men and masculinity, bought a Kindle while drunk, applied for a Blogcademy scholarship, attended the Feminist Porn Awards and Feminist Porn Conference, spoke to Jiz Lee, baked my own birthday cake, attended two tapings of the George Stroumboulopoulos show (and met him), interned for an e-magazine, got published in a zine about queer ladies, played an L Word drinking game, got a 3DS and played it a lot, attended a public outdoor screening of Anchorman, masturbated among friends, posed for dirty Instax photos, became a beer drinker, saw Angels in America live (thrice), saw Matilda and Kinky Boots on Broadway, visited the Museum of Sex, attended my grandmother’s unveiling, attended a jazz/comedy show at a lesbian bar, met Lea DeLaria, started selling ads and sponsored content on my blog, wrote a feature story about social events for shy people, visited Montreal, attended a wedding, put together and performed a show with my brother.

2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Last year I resolved to “be more social and go out more,” which, lololol, I totally did not do. I also resolved to eliminate my usage of ableist slurs like crazy, insane, lame, etc. and I did okay on that. They still slip out from time to time but I’m doing much better with it. This year I resolve to actively expand my blog’s readership: more how-to posts, more networking, more great reviews, etc. I also resolve to pitch to more magazines and newspapers and try to get my print career off the ground.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Not that I know of.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not that I know of.

5. What countries did you visit?
The USA (New York).

6. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked in 2013?
More of a social life.

7. What date from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory?
I don’t remember the exact dates, but the Feminist Porn Awards and Conference were amazing and I’ll remember them always.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Improved my writing a lot, both at school and in my personal projects, and gained much more popularity and traction for my blog. Accepted my introversion as I came to understand it better.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Spent too much time doing nothing.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Early in the year, I had mysterious allergies for 2-3 months. When I went to the allergist and got tested, he told me I am allergic to various types of grass but that this wouldn’t explain why I had felt sick for months in the wintertime. Still haven’t figured out what happened there. I also had a scary few minutes later in the year where my chest hurt a lot and I thought I was having some kind of heart episode. I called Telehealth and they told me to call an ambulance, but my symptoms had mostly subsided by then so I didn’t.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My Kindle, winter boots, and winter coat.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Eric, Damian, and Max. They are always happy to support me emotionally when I need it. My best guys.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Rob Ford?

14. Where did most of your money go?
Clothes/accessories and theatre tickets (I spent about $220 on Angels in America alone).

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Getting fairly paid for my work. Impressing my features prof. Seeing amazing theatre.

16. What song/album will always remind you of 2013?
Tegan and Sara’s “Heartthrob” album, which was the soundtrack of much of my year.
Justin Timberlake’s “Pusher Love Girl” and “Suit and Tie.”
John Legend’s whole “Love in the Future” album.
Neil Gaiman singing “Jump” while accompanied by Amanda Palmer.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Er, maybe sadder? I’ve been succumbing to S.A.D. pretty hard lately, but am trying to get out of it.
ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter. I gained 10 pounds over the summer when I was working from home. I will step up my exercise routine in the new year, but I like my soft chubby body nonetheless!
iii. richer or poorer? Poorer – Christmas presents were expensive this year! – but my credit card bill will soon be paid off. No worries.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Cleaning my room, writing in my journal, attending social events, making music.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Sitting around doing nothing. (Same answer as last year.)

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Exchanging presents and eating delicious meals with my family and my love. (Same answer as last year.)

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
Interviewees for the various feature stories I wrote this year. Phone interviews are pretty much my only phone interactions at this point.

22. Did you fall in love in 2013?
No, but I stayed in love… (Same answer as last year.)

23. How many one night stands in this last year?
None. Not my thing. (Same answer as last year.)

24. What was your favourite TV programme?
The Big Bang Theory and New Girl. So comfortingly funny and silly.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Not that I can think of.

26. What was the best book you read?
Best fiction book: Alice in Wonderland (Lewis Carroll).
Best nonfiction books: Why is the Penis Shaped Like That? (Jesse Bering), The Introvert’s Way (Sophia Dembling).

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I didn’t discover anyone I loved this year; I mostly just listened to new stuff by old favorites.

28. What did you want and get?
Became a better writer. Expanded my blog. Started to feel more comfortable at school.

29. What did you want and not get?
Ample social opportunities.

30. What was your favourite film of this year?
I loved Anchorman 2, of course. I saw Monsters University twice in theatres and it was great. The Incredible Burt Wunderstone was hilarious. Before Midnight made me weep and sigh. And the new Gatsby was absolutely stunning.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 21. A bunch of friends and I went to Snakes and Lattes and played board games. Then some of them came over to my house in the evening for drinks and such.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Being less shy. (I swear I say this every year…)

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2013?
Still feminine and brightly-colored, but moving in a more casual, college-y direction. More jeans, leggings, oversized sweaters, etc.

34. What kept you sane?
My family, Damian, my cat, Netflix, alone time, naps, body-positive blogs.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Josh Radnor, Jim Parsons, and Jake Johnson. The holy trinity of J’s.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
As I say every year: feminist and LGBT issues. I also, like most folks in Toronto, got pretty pissed about all this Rob Ford business.

37. Who did you miss?
Eric, Cadence, my grandmothers.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
I didn’t really make any new friends this year, although I did meet some very cool and interesting people in the process of researching feature stories.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013.
Part of being good to yourself is about accepting your limitations and honoring them. Another part of being good to yourself is about getting out of your comfort zone when you know you need to.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
“People are just people. They shouldn’t make you nervous. … People are just people like you.” (Regina Spektor, “Ghost of Corporate Future”)
“I can’t believe, sometimes, that I’m an adult, and that girls like I was think that I have this shit figured out.” (Amanda Palmer, “Judy Blume”)


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